The French polymath, Blaise Pascal, said all of humankind’s problems were tied to one behavioral deficit: our inability to sit quietly in a room doing nothing.
What about you? How often on a given day or week do you sit in silence?
If you’re like most, your answer is rarely if ever. And that, as Pascal says, leads to a lot of problems. Fortunately, it also points to the obvious solution to our problems.
Silence or Suffering?
Would you rather sit quietly in a room with only your thoughts to occupy you, or self-administer an uncomfortable electrical shock? Seems like a stupid question.
In a series of experiments, University of Virginia psychologist Timothy Wilson put participants in an empty room and asked them to sit quietly for brief stretches of time (roughly 6 – 15 minutes). Their only possible distraction? To zap themselves with an electrode attached to their ankle.
“Never miss a good chance to shut up.” – Will Rogers
Shockingly (pun intended), most of the male participants (67%) found the silence so maddening they opted for the shock, while 25% of the women chose that option. Again, we’re talking minutes of silence. One male participant shocked himself 190 times.
No matter who Wilson chose for the experiment – university students, church goers, shoppers at a farmer’s market – the results were largely the same. Most people despise being left alone with their thoughts.
“What is striking is that simply being alone with their own thoughts … was apparently so aversive that it drove many participants to self-administer an electric shock that they had earlier said they would pay to avoid,” wrote the researchers.
Why Silence Hurts
While virtually every other species on the planet can sit quietly for hours, humans struggle. One study in the Netherlands demonstrated that a mere 4-second pause in conversation left participants feeling deeply uncomfortable.
“Silence is a source of Great Strength.” – Lao Tzu
Other studies have connected the explosive rise in social media and smartphone usage with a growing inability to tolerate silence. How bad has it gotten? Most of the students found themselves incapable of studying in a library due to the absence of distractions.
What’s going on?
The answer, in a word, is thought. As self-aware creatures, we identify with our thoughts. And that’s not good thing, since most thoughts are both repetitious and negative. To augment Rene Descarte’s famous maxim, it might more accurately be stated: I think, therefore I’m miserable.
Research consistently demonstrates that of the thousands of thoughts that occur to the average individual each day, the majority are negative in nature. It should come as no surprise that few of us want to sit in silence while being mentally battered.
In his far-reaching studies into flow, psychologist Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi found that when people lack a focus for their attention, their minds become increasingly chaotic. Suddenly, those electrical shocks make a bit more sense (not to mention the omnipresent distraction-box aka smartphone).
All of which is a shame, because silence – when we learn to embrace it – is incredibly beneficial.
The Magic of Silence
First and foremost, we cannot stress enough the immense value of regularly investing a few minutes of your time in silence. Much like meditation or time spent in solitude, the benefits of silence are truly golden.
The giants of philosophy, spirituality, and religion knew this, which is why so much of their wisdom was consistently punctuated with calls to silence, stillness, quiescence.
“I’ve begun to realize that you can listen to silence and learn from it. It has a quality and a dimension all its own.” – Chaim Potok
OK, so what are some of the many benefits of silence?
Self-Awareness – Sitting in silence and observing – rather than engaging – thoughts demonstrates that you are the witness rather than the architect of thought. This is a powerful, life-changing observation that should be made over and over until it is second-nature. The main benefit, of course, is that it frees you from feeling victim to your thoughts.
Creativity – Many if not most of the world’s great creators spend inordinate amounts of time in silence. As noted above, psychologist Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi’s research revealed that silence brings higher levels of creativity and the flow that comes with it.
“Sometimes we get lost in the maze of all the noise we are surrounded by. We forget one thing: Silence! You can only learn when you are silent.” – Nesta Jojoe Erskine
Focus – For obvious reasons, people who learn to sit in silence are far better at concentrating than are those who are subject to the discordant whim of thoughts.
Productivity – Research shows that we perform poorly in the presence of noise and better in silence. Studies have even found that two hours of silence each day leads to the development of new cells in the brain’s hippocampus, which is tied to memory and learning.
Mental and Physical Health – Regular doses of silence will lead to improved levels of calm and patience; reduced stress; lower blood pressure; and boost the immune system.
Finding Silence
Learning to sit in silence is not nearly as difficult as you might think. The following is just one approach that’s worked for us.
- Pick a spot where you can consistently find some serenity and not be disturbed.
- Turn off or otherwise mute all devices.
- Do not sit next to a computer screen, television, or other potential distractions.
- Get comfortable. You do not need to sit in a lotus position! Find a position that’s right for you.
- Start slowly. Even 30 seconds of silence is a great start.
- Observe your thoughts. In the event you follow one out of the train station, as you soon as you recognize it, go back. Easy-peasy.
- Focus on your breathing – in, out, in, out. Like a metronome, your breathing can help.
The more you practice these tiny silence retreats, the easier they’ll become and the more you’ll want to practice them.
